2012 Sandwich Fest Season Review: Quarterbacks

If you're looking for a respite from the A-Rod coverage, please allow Sandwich Fest to be your desert oasis.  On tap for today is a look back at the top 20 quarterbacks as per Sandwich Fest's patented Advanced QB Scoring System (patent pending).

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1. Aaron Rodgers - 431.60 pts.  Clearly I'm not as dumb as Hemrick would have you believe since I traded for the #1 QB, Aaron Rodgers.

He just needed 1.96 more points in our opening round playoff matchup and you'd be looking at the two-time defending champion.  Instead, I get shit from Hemrick.  I'm over it. Swear.  Obviously he'll be top-5 again.  If you pick Aaron Rodgers and aren't an ungrateful bastard like Hemrick, you won't be disappointed.

2. Tom Brady - 417.78 pts. Speaking of not being disappointed, The Tom Brady Show checks in at #2.  Hill and myself and anyone who's owned Tom Brady can tell you how fun it is.  Pencil him for 30 every week and don't worry about the QB1 spot.  The question is, can the great Tom Brady still be a top-5 QB without Aaron Hernandez (killed a bunch of people), Wes Welker (in Denver), and a compromised Gronk with his weekly off-season surgeries?  Yes, he can.  I mean, check this guy out.  He has the hair Bry's always wanted.

3. Drew Brees - 410.58 pts. The Drew Brees hype is ramping up with Sean Peyton back and the same complement of weapons.  He was the lone bright spot on PromNiteDumpsterBaby's also-ran squad and is no doubt looking forward to a new year.  He has James Graham, so he should throw for at least 89 TDs this year.

obligatory James Graham photo

4. Peyton Manning - 402.46 pts. The 2nd piece of the Defending Champs all-star QB roster was Mr. Peyton Manning. Much like Tom Brady, if Peyton Manning is on the field, I expect him to dominate, and he did.  He's back for 2013 and is top-5 option after finishing #4 last year.  Even at age 37, he's still rocking a Grade A Manning Face as well.

5. Matt Ryan - 402.36 pts.  Rounding out the top 5 is Matty Ice.  He's also the last QB to top 400 Sandwich Fest points last year and it's not hard to see why.  Accurate QB, throws in a dome, and has 3 elite receiving options and this year gets Steven Jackson to join the offense.  No reason to think he won't be close to this again in 2013.

6-10. RGIII, Tony Romo, Cam Newton, Matthew Stafford, and Russell Wilson.  Six through 10 includes four young QBs with upside and Tony Romo, who people used to hate, but now I think only Cowboys fans hate.

RGIII leads this group with 370 points, and could've hit 400 had he not missed a game.  Unfortunately that could happen a lot.  Dude took some big hits.  And this:

"I broke my knee man"

But he was an absolute BEAST last year when healthy.  Right Hill?

I'm surprised to see Russell Wilson made the top ten, but probably more surprised to see Newton and Stafford up this high.  It seemed like they could've been even better, especially coming off big 2011 seasons. With Stafford, it took him awhile to get going.  In his first five games, Stafford only had a QBR over 80 once and that was enough to kill Bry's season.  And as far as I'm concerned, Cam Newton sabotaged The Holo What?, and I believe killed Joe's parents.   What an asshole.

11-15. Matt Schaub, Andy Dalton, Andrew Luck, Joe Flacco, Ben Roethlisberger.  Seeing Schaub, Flacco, Benny McRape, and to a lesser extent Andy Dalton, in the top 15 makes me feel like QB isn't as deep as I thought.  Flacco already was without Anquan Boldin, and now Dennis Pitta is out too.  Ol' Rapey has a rookie RB and lost Mike Wallace.  Aside from Luck, this is a shaky group.

16-20. Eli Manning, Carson Palmer, Sam Bradford, Phil Rivers, Josh Freeman.  Still not feeling great about this group.  Although Eli, Palmer and Sammy are all in better situations this year (Eli due to injuries; Palmer in a better offense in Arizona; Rams using the draft to help out Bradford).  The other two I think are almost done, Freeman especially.

Of the crew at 11-20, I can easily see 5 of them falling out of the top 20 this year.  Who replaces them? Well for one, Kaepernick will get a full season now.  And don't be surprised if this guy:

makes a jump with a new offensive coordinator and The Black Unicorn at TE.  Other than those two, we could see Tannehill and Brandon Weeden get into that 16-20 range.

The Sandwich Fest patented Advanced QB Scoring System (patent pending) always makes QB's a unique proposition.  Do you plan to play one in the flex or not?  It's no longer an automatic.